Abuse in the Confessional: Understanding the Gifts and Risks of the Sacrament of Penance
Terence McKiernan
Multiple survivors in the Awake community have shared that confession, formally known as the sacrament of penance and reconciliation, played a role in their abuse.
In some cases, the sexual abuse itself took place in the confessional or reconciliation room. Other times, information the priest heard from a person in confession was used to groom, manipulate, and victimize them. And some survivors have described situations in which confession took place immediately before abuse or after it.
Terence McKiernan, best known as founder and co-director of BishopAccountability.org, an extensive archive of information about sexual abuse in the Catholic Church, is currently researching and writing a book about confession, including its history in the Church and influence in broader culture. The book will also consider what McKiernan calls “the horror of confessional abuse” and what survivor stories can tell us about the risks of harm in this sacrament.
The Power of Confession
McKiernan says his project is inspired by the profound experiences he has personally had in confession. During this sacrament, a Catholic speaks their sins aloud to a priest, who assigns some form of penance. The penitent expresses sorrow for their sins, and then the priest provides absolution, standing in for Jesus and offering forgiveness for the sins. This can be a source of healing and mercy. “I'm not anti-confession,” McKiernan says. “I think it's a really powerful sacrament. And that power is both beneficial and dangerous.”
That potential for harm is explored in the 2007 documentary Hand of God by filmmaker Joe Cultrera, who describes his brother Paul’s experience of confessional abuse and the deep impact on their family. The documentary, which McKiernan calls “the great movie about the abuse crisis” also motivated him to take a closer look at the sacrament of penance.
Hand of God explains how, during confession, Fr. Joseph Birmingham asked Paul and other boys if they masturbated. If they said yes, he would urge them to come to the rectory afterward for further discussion, which would lead to abuse.
McKiernan has collected more than 400 examples like these of confessional abuse, drawn from public and Church documents collected by Bishop Accountability, as well as state attorneys general reports, and memoirs written by abuse survivors. The cases range from the late 1940s to 2023. “Once you begin reading and hearing these stories,” McKiernan says, “you realize that the sacrament and abuse are so woven together that we do ourselves a disservice not to acknowledge this and to think of them together.”
How the Church’s Confession Practices Have Changed
Pope Innocent III mandated, in 1215, that Catholics receive communion at least once a year, ideally in the Easter season, and confess grave sins at least once a year. These mandates remain in effect today under canon law.
In the early twentieth century Pope Pius X stressed the benefits for Catholics of regular communion and confession, and “he also thought that this should begin at age seven, when children reach the age of reason,” McKiernan explains.
“The sacrament of confession has changed radically over the 2,000 year history of the Church,” he adds, suggesting that there is the possibility for a pope to alter the sacrament to make it safer.
McKiernan points to a 2025 book about confession, For I Have Sinned by James O’Toole, which describes the dramatic decline in confession among American Catholics. At the same time, some priests report long lines of people—especially young adults—coming for confession in their parishes, McKiernan says.
Could These Measures Reduce Abuse in Confession?
Educating Catholics About Confession. McKiernan has identified multiple cases of abuse perpetrated during first reconciliation. These include the disturbing case of John Calnan, an Irish-born priest who served both in Augusta, Georgia and West Cork, Ireland. In 2015 Calnan pleaded guilty to digitally penetrating a seven-year-old girl in West Cork while he heard her first confession.
Adults harmed as children during first confession sometimes recall that they were uncertain at the time if the abuse was actually part of the sacrament. McKiernan believes that children in particular need better preparation, to make it clear what is and isn’t appropriate in the reconciliation room.
In 2022 Fr. Eric Silva was removed from parishes in Rhode Island after parents alleged that he asked their children direct questions about sex in the confessional. For example, he would ask boys if they were gay and girls if they were sexually active—and suggest that they were lying if they answered no.
The prevailing wisdom among theologians, McKiernan says, is that priests should not “interrogate” a person in confession, asking them if they have committed particular sins, including those related to sex. “Of course, a priest does sometimes need to ask questions,” to clarify the nature of the sins a person confesses, he says, but “you confess what you confess, period.”
Given the importance of preparing people well for first confession, and establishing ground rules such as “no direct questions about sex,” McKiernan wonders if seven might be too young for children to receive the sacrament for the first time. Detailed preparation is essential, McKiernan adds, given that “every Catholic kid has first confession,” he says, and many kids at Catholic schools or on Catholic retreats regularly participate in the sacrament.
Distinguishing Confession and Spiritual Direction. In some instances of confessional abuse, a priest will hear a person’s confession and suggest that they meet separately for spiritual direction. McKiernan sees this as a red flag; spiritual direction is a very different type of relationship that requires particular training for the priest, he says. Priests and others who provide spiritual direction typically have “supervision” or support from an experienced mentor or advisor who provides oversight and guidance.
McKiernan believes that keeping confession and spiritual direction separate is a wise way to increase safety. “If the priest says, ‘let’s have a follow-up meeting at the rectory,’ you should say no,” he recommends.
Using the Sacrament to Limit or Stop Abuse. McKiernan notes that some priests have used the sacrament of penance to confess that they committed sexual abuse, and he wonders about the potential role the sacrament could play in halting abuse by priests.
For example, he notes that the Catholic Church has a category of sins, known as “reserved sins,” which are considered so grave that the priest hearing confession must consult a bishop before granting absolution. Making sexual abuse a reserved sin could be an alternative way to ensure—“one hopes,” McKiernan says—that a clergy member who confesses to this sin “isn’t given easy absolution,” he adds.
“One value of that approach would be that the Church would be acknowledging confessional abuse, whereas now… defenders of the status quo are ignoring the fact that confessional abuse is a problem,” McKiernan says. “That’s the first step the Church must take.”
McKiernan hopes to encourage transparent honesty about the risks of confessional abuse. “I recognize the power of confession for good and for evil,” he says. “Even if the Church acts to make confession more safe and penitents more mindful, it’ll still be a dangerous sacrament, where some priests do terrible things to children and adults.”
—Erin O’Donnell
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